August movie playlist

- A Single Man
- Ride With The Devil
- Dear Wendy
- Braindead
- Thirst
- Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
- City Of Lost Souls
- Repulsion
- Inglourious Basterds
- Repulsion
- Departures
- The Lookout
- The Puffy Chair
- Mother
- Rope
- The Puffy Chair
- Little Miss Sunshine
- Jurassic Park & Jaws (PCC double bill)
- Hatchet & E.T. (PCC double bill)

FRIGHTFEST 2010:
- Hatchet II
- Primal
- Eggshells
- Texas Chainsaw Massacre
- F
- Red Hill
- Dream Home
- The Pack
- We Are What We Are
- Damned By Dawn
- Buried
- Diary of Anne Frankenstein
- The Loved Ones
- Red White & Blue
- The Last Exorcism

the short answer is Never Give Up

2010 has been a very odd year and it’s culminated recently in a verging-on-existential-crisis-moment. Just one of those WTF Am I Doing kind of feelings that’s been exacerbated by still being out of work and being given notice on my beautiful place in Bloomsbury, meaning I may have to move back to my parents for a while (eeek). I sat down to write a basic day-to-day email to my BFF in NY, and it ended up turning into a rather epic outpouring of everything. His response was the best pep talk ever – raw, honest, verging on brutal – but it’s what I needed to hear. What I already knew on some level, I guess, but you still want someone who knows the path, who’s been there, is already there, to tell you about it. Excerpts below, because I think it bears frequent reading:

From: Dan
To: Hannah
Date: Mon, Aug 30, 2010 at 3:57 PM
Subject: Re: this turned into a really epic email. like, get-a-cup-of-coffee long.

...[It’s] the usual existential crisis for the creative class - those of us with the permanent job problem since all we really want to do is make things and learn. Let me tell, you, it only gets tougher as you get older and everyone you know has kids and steadiness and plans and savings accounts...

Part of this is simply accepting your shape. Anyway, those years from 17-26 are never wasted, or to be more precise, they are the part of us that is shaped by not worrying, trying things out, getting lost, being stupid, having fun and through it all, forming our ideas and ideals. I mean, when did you learn to be passionate? Not just about film, but about life (and film too)? Those are the years... What you mustn't do is think you're done being passionate (or stupid or wasted or having fun) even though this is the time for you to focus that passion towards satisfying Greater Needs. For most people, those years almost accidentally lead them onto a path, through a relationship, or kids, or a job that started out fine and then became permanent. (I don't mean to say none of those people are passionate, but it does get beaten out of one.) While you're out having fun, you end up dancing into a box and boom you're stuck. For a few of us, we were never really going to let that happen. For us, the passion is the point.

So then, the only question is, what are those Greater Needs I mentioned? It is a simple human desire to be satisfied - no, pleased (overjoyed!) - at the products of our hands and hearts and minds. It is, unfortunately, not in the interests of Capitalism for us to express or even understand that desire. We are removed from our work, and our labor is at the service of Capital only. We are taught to subsume those desires under an unformed lust for shoes and shiny things. So of course the road is tough for those of us trying to make it in the Matrix, when it all just looks like ugly code... I'm telling you, that part will not get easier. It is only easy for the Trustafarians and the Insanely Fortunate. We are really neither, and have to use the light of our little personal passions as the beacon to carry us through the Dark Nights. I have indeed had many of these nights recently, but every day I thank the gods for that beacon, for without it, I would be truly lost.

...Make your goals and to-do lists enormous in scope, but small in steps. Baby steps will get you the way, on steadier feet. (Much better than standing around waiting for your feet to grow...) Keep talking to everyone you can. Keep pushing as hard as you can, no matter what.

Hannah, I'll keep saying it - it only gets harder. Turn up the music and the light on that beacon and know that you are doing the right thing. That excitement you feel when you think about making movies is the key; is there anything else that could make you so completely happy and feeling worthwhile?!? Remember also that we have little say over where the wind and weather will blow our little boats. Just keep that beacon in sight, and your life will be right.

I love you. Stay strong.

So I guess, in other words, keep on keepin' on ...

D.I.Y. Music Labels Embrace D.I.Y. Film

Interesting article in the NYT about the worlds of indie film and indie music colliding:

"Jagjaguwar is one of a number of indie music labels and hybrid companies that have turned to film distribution, some following the model laid out by seminal punk labels like Dischord and Touch and Go: stay small and informal, know your audience, and put out stuff you like. In the last few years, both the independent film world and the independent music world have stratified, shrunk by digital sales, a crowded entertainment market and the collapse of major specialty divisions. Money is harder to come by now. But experimentation can rule, and a few players have found that there’s a niche, and a clear overlap, in putting out D.I.Y. music and D.I.Y. film. "

Read full article here: D.I.Y. Music Labels Embrace D.I.Y. Film

pearls of wisdom

From the Producer, as we watch the DoP and two camera assistants reverently handling the Arri:

"It's like these tech people just get a hard-on in their brain when they get around the camera."

adventures in production managing

Made the jump from production assistant to production coordinator/manager this week, working with a London Film School team in connection with the Fast Forward producing scheme. Saw the ad on Mandy.com and dropped them a line, not expecting much, but the producers dug my CV so we met for a chat and they asked to me to come on board.

It was only a couple days before the shoot so a lot of the usual production coordinator tasks had already been taken care of; I was more there as an extra pair of hands, helping to get quotes and arrange van hire and so on.

Sunday was spent running around west London, collecting first the van, then a trip to Panalux in Park Royal to get the lighting kit (so much!) then to Panavision in Greenford to pick up the Arri 3 and everything that goes with the camera. Having not shot on film for years, it was interesting seeing how much was required (gosh, digital is a good deal simpler, isn't it?)

We were shooting in a props yard in west London, about 10 minutes away from my parents' house, so I just moved back with them for the week; I actually barely ever saw them as I was usually out all day, and would get back late to find my mum had left me dinner, despite my saying don't bother (my mother is practically incapable of not feeding us, if we're home). Call time most days was 8 to 8:30am, which wasn't too bad and we were exterior shooting almost all week. As it was early August, the weather was pretty good for most of it, but of course, this is England, so we also had a fair bit of cloud cover (which bugged the DP no end) and a day of constant rain. I caught the sun pretty quickly (perils of being fair skinned), but still better than sitting in an office all day...

The first day our main task was to figure out where we were going to sort out the food for lunch. One of the producer's mums had cooked us a ton of amazing Iranian food, but there was no where in the props yard to heat it up. We ended up at the kebab shop on the main road (Boston Grill on Boston Manor Road, should you ever wish to visit), sweet-talking the guy behind the counter. His name was Faro, and he told us that he'd been working in central London when they were shooting American Werewolf, and had ended up as a background extra during the big Piccadilly Circus scenes. Hilarious. He was happy to come let us use his kitchen every day, which was a massive help.

As well as sorting lunch, I was making sure things were stocked and managing the runners. Though, resume-wise, it was a rather quick jump from runner/assistant to production manager, having made our own short at the beginning of the year with minimal crew and budget, it was actually a really easy shift into the role, and I found that everything I'd had to do on Playtime's Over came in handy on this shoot. It also helped that we were working in a part of London I knew well, as I could easily run errands, knew where places were - and how to get to them quickly.

There was one fabulously Film School moment, when I was chatting with one of the students as we were finishing for the day, asking him what he was up to that evening.

"Oh, just going to throw on some Kurosawa, you know."

Film School Students. They just don't help themselves, do they?